








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 193 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
737 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,386 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 293 | 21% |
| Smokes | 205 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 531 | 38% |
| Molotovs | 357 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $287,375 of utility $224 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 95 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mada | 100% | 4 |
| #2 | DogCow | 80% | 5 |
| #3 | ChypStrONKjk | 80% | 5 |
| #4 | gatch | 80% | 5 |
| #5 | E-Girl Hunter | 78% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E-Girl Hunter | 2 | 0.0048 |
| #2 | NoTi' | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | ChypStrONKjk | 2 | 0.0206 |
| #4 | Lil ripped jeezus | 1 | 0.0023 |
| #5 | Jenny Tal1a | 1 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lil ripped jeezus | 35 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #2 | NoTi' | 32 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | Fabio | 19 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #4 | DEKSTERS | 17 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | brzns | 11 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | E-Girl Hunter | +6.34 | 88 | 33 |
| #2 | Fabio | +4.56 | 90 | 53 |
| #3 | TAGS | +3.64 | 90 | 48 |
| #4 | Limbazu_Piens | +3.48 | 96 | 48 |
| #5 | gatch | +2.16 | 84 | 48 |





