








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 371 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 676 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 43 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




30 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8772 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 35,132 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 10977 | 31% |
| Smokes | 9221 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 8259 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 6675 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,416,931 of utility $88 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 320 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | bungle | 47% | 135 |
| #8 | sMYGAREN | 46% | 235 |
| #9 | lasaron | 45% | 264 |
| #10 | Blåingen ✪ | 43% | 157 |
| #11 | Fager | 39% | 41 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hysfeskar | 17 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | sMYGAREN | 12 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | lasaron | 5 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | bungle | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Slægga | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hysfeskar | 1720 | 0.13 | 46 min |
| #2 | sMYGAREN | 930 | 0.19 | 26 min |
| #3 | blindusa | 575 | 0.05 | 17 min |
| #4 | lasaron | 541 | 0.10 | 11 min |
| #5 | bungle | 259 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | blindusa | +2.13 | 82 | 75 |
| #2 | haugen | +1.65 | 79 | 80 |
| #3 | sMYGAREN | +0.21 | 68 | 74 |
| #4 | hysfeskar | +0.15 | 58 | 73 |
| #5 | father badass | -0.97 | 68 | 65 |





