








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 438 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 505 matches | ||
| Wingman | 29 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




27 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4887 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,032 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4471 | 23% |
| Smokes | 6415 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 5662 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 2484 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,295,611 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 202 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Mic | 45% | 102 |
| #12 | Milo | 44% | 182 |
| #13 | Suk Mike Hok | 44% | 57 |
| #14 | vilderen^ | 43% | 47 |
| #15 | Bysted \\ | 40% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roe | 585 | 0.11 | 14 min |
| #2 | BC | 474 | 0.20 | 15 min |
| #3 | Mic | 207 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #4 | ✪Justin Sane | 205 | 0.14 | 6 min |
| #5 | *Xthezee* | 173 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Justin Sane | +2.99 | 62 | 78 |
| #2 | Suk Mike Hok | +2.68 | 77 | 45 |
| #3 | vilderen^ | +1.25 | 85 | 55 |
| #4 | Mic | +0.99 | 69 | 65 |
| #5 | El Papi | -0.11 | 57 | 38 |





