










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 232 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 13 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
596 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,448 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 410 | 28% |
| Smokes | 389 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 282 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 367 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $276,463 of utility $251 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 371 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShyRa | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | notProxy | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Goofy | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | EVANje | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | S0LSKEN⭕⃤ | 67% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | S0LSKEN⭕⃤ | 67% | 3 |
| #6 | YOYO LA DESTRUCTION | 43% | 14 |
| #7 | Bidow | 38% | 16 |
| #8 | Arkenos | 33% | 3 |
| #9 | abwi ඞ | 20% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Bidow | 74 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | notProxy | 70 | 0.37 | 2 min |
| #3 | YOYO LA DESTRUCTION | 59 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #4 | abwi ඞ | 22 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| #5 | S0LSKEN⭕⃤ | 17 | 0.24 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ShyRa | +3.44 | 79 | 57 |
| #2 | Arkenos | +3.26 | 77 | 63 |
| #3 | Bidow | +1.51 | 84 | 72 |
| #4 | Goofy | +1.03 | 71 | 83 |
| #5 | ritpu | +0.46 | 85 | 60 |





