








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 430 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 227 matches | ||
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 18 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2797 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,269 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2320 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2925 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3255 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1769 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,008,301 of utility $146 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 131 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esde | 49% | 209 |
| #2 | kap0w | 49% | 139 |
| #3 | hannibal | 46% | 260 |
| #4 | vaid | 44% | 211 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Esde | 49% | 209 |
| #2 | kap0w | 49% | 139 |
| #3 | hannibal | 46% | 260 |
| #4 | vaid | 44% | 211 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hannibal | 11 | 0.0020 |
| #2 | Esde | 8 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | vaid | 7 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | kap0w | 2 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | hannibal | 659 | 0.12 | 20 min |
| #2 | kap0w | 376 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #3 | vaid | 245 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #4 | Esde | 114 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kap0w | +2.14 | 75 | 58 |
| #2 | phirsisch | +0.72 | 56 | 66 |
| #3 | hannibal | -1.22 | 41 | 74 |
| #4 | vaid | -1.52 | 58 | 68 |
| #5 | Esde | -1.69 | 33 | 51 |





