








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 217 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 469 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5123 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,317 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8675 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7912 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 4433 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 3297 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $483,178 of utility $43 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 483 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fLaXy | 61% | 56 |
| #2 | cuddl3bums | 59% | 29 |
| #3 | Waffle | 53% | 53 |
| #4 | Zema | 49% | 292 |
| #5 | Bullbilen | 47% | 390 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zema | 1327 | 0.21 | 37 min |
| #2 | Bullbilen | 477 | 0.06 | 12 min |
| #3 | rakad baever^ | 190 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | Fullcab | 150 | 0.03 | 3 min |
| #5 | fLaXy | 99 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zema | +2.35 | 46 | 77 |
| #2 | fLaXy | +2.04 | 58 | 70 |
| #3 | Waffle | +1.00 | 49 | 56 |
| #4 | fLaXy | +0.95 | 55 | 71 |
| #5 | rakad baever^ | +0.27 | 66 | 61 |





