










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
63 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 183 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 27 | 15% |
| Smokes | 71 | 39% |
| HE Grenades | 71 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 14 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $10,644 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Otukka On Top! | 100% | 2 |
| #2 | HSR_P1sk1_Rac1ng | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | konetiskitabletti (downsyndrome) | 50% | 2 |
| #4 | 70cc-Derbi PEEK NOGGE | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | Paageri 69 | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | 70cc-Derbi PEEK NOGGE | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | Paageri 69 | 33% | 3 |
| #6 | Lepakkoleevi666 | 25% | 4 |
| #7 | JOKUMIES | 25% | 8 |
| #8 | lukki | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKUMIES | 4 | 0.0253 |
| #2 | Otukka On Top! | 3 | 0.1111 |
| #3 | Paageri 69 | 2 | 0.0313 |
| #4 | 70cc-Derbi PEEK NOGGE | 1 | 0.0096 |
| #5 | lukki | 1 | 0.0179 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKUMIES | 30 | 0.19 | 0 min |
| #2 | Otukka On Top! | 11 | 0.41 | 0 min |
| #3 | lukki | 9 | 0.16 | 0 min |
| #4 | konetiskitabletti (downsyndrome) | 7 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #5 | 70cc-Derbi PEEK NOGGE | 6 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKUMIES | +9.19 | 85 | 53 |
| #2 | Otukka On Top! | +5.67 | 86 | 13 |
| #3 | HSR_P1sk1_Rac1ng | +2.80 | 23 | 9 |
| #4 | lukki | +1.54 | 35 | 64 |
| #5 | konetiskitabletti (downsyndrome) | +1.25 | 60 | 39 |





