








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 448 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 182 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 24 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




25 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2147 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,698 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1391 | 38% |
| Smokes | 430 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1231 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 646 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $947,568 of utility $133 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 785 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PeperitoKeperitoBurito | 61% | 44 |
| #2 | MIEZIITS | 59% | 39 |
| #3 | BD42Pingiviins | 58% | 19 |
| #4 | Wiesulis | 56% | 61 |
| #5 | goofey` | 52% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKER | 20 | 0.0135 |
| #2 | goofey` | 17 | 0.0155 |
| #3 | BD42ΔͺΔA | 7 | 0.0094 |
| #4 | BD42PΔ«pΔtΔjs | 7 | 0.0113 |
| #5 | PeperitoKeperitoBurito | 6 | 0.0070 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MIEZIITS | 149 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #2 | PeperitoKeperitoBurito | 97 | 0.11 | 2 min |
| #3 | πΎπππππππ | 96 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | goofey` | 93 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #5 | BD42ΔͺΔA | 70 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JOKER | +6.82 | 74 | 36 |
| #2 | PeperitoKeperitoBurito | +4.83 | 52 | 62 |
| #3 | BD42ΔͺΔA | +4.82 | 52 | 55 |
| #4 | BD42Pingiviins | +4.24 | 58 | 69 |
| #5 | goofey` | +3.23 | 71 | 51 |





