








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 280 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
541 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 820 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 244 | 30% |
| Smokes | 104 | 13% |
| HE Grenades | 360 | 44% |
| Molotovs | 112 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $380,982 of utility $239 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 12 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaNd1T | 29% | 42 |
| #2 | СРУ_СОРАКСЕМЬ | 25% | 8 |
| #3 | yokyface | 21% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaNd1T | 29% | 42 |
| #2 | СРУ_СОРАКСЕМЬ | 25% | 8 |
| #3 | yokyface | 21% | 19 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaNd1T | 19 | 0.0248 |
| #2 | yokyface | 15 | 0.0417 |
| #3 | СРУ_СОРАКСЕМЬ | 1 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yokyface | 126 | 0.35 | 2 min |
| #2 | BaNd1T | 32 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #3 | СРУ_СОРАКСЕМЬ | 20 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yokyface | +1.08 | 38 | 22 |
| #2 | chhifironi | +0.59 | 26 | 33 |
| #3 | СРУ_СОРАКСЕМЬ | -5.86 | 2 | 55 |
| #4 | BaNd1T | -6.17 | 3 | 20 |





