








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 107 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 95 matches | ||
| Premier | 70 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 67 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 81 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




94 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9326 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,567 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8875 | 41% |
| Smokes | 4618 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3111 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 4963 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,927,396 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1911 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Darkzeroizme | 60% | 60 |
| #2 | Min Yaun | 56% | 183 |
| #3 | Iamsupernoob | 53% | 107 |
| #4 | Hilda | 52% | 60 |
| #5 | let me lick u feet | 51% | 49 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | let me lick u feet | 51% | 49 |
| #6 | Nippon Icchi Yohoho | 50% | 106 |
| #7 | lightshadow | 49% | 179 |
| #8 | BAU-BAU | 49% | 68 |
| #9 | Trilaanhcuaminh | 44% | 189 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lightshadow | 15 | 0.0043 |
| #2 | Nippon Icchi Yohoho | 13 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | Trilaanhcuaminh | 11 | 0.0030 |
| #4 | Iamsupernoob | 10 | 0.0047 |
| #5 | BAU-BAU | 8 | 0.0062 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lightshadow | 1072 | 0.31 | 22 min |
| #2 | Nippon Icchi Yohoho | 573 | 0.27 | 12 min |
| #3 | Min Yaun | 528 | 0.15 | 11 min |
| #4 | Iamsupernoob | 481 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #5 | let me lick u feet | 321 | 0.33 | 7 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | +W Soldier | +5.92 | 70 | 70 |
| #2 | Iamsupernoob | +1.05 | 19 | 59 |
| #3 | Nippon Icchi Yohoho | -0.81 | 31 | 45 |
| #4 | let me lick u feet | -2.16 | 9 | 49 |
| #5 | BAU-BAU | -2.22 | 20 | 52 |





