








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 776 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 286 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 22 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




86 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3345 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,798 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3822 | 32% |
| Smokes | 3039 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2729 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 2208 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,131,516 of utility $151 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1537 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yoManChigago | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | Lentävä sBaGetti | 54% | 189 |
| #3 | ari housu | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Juhana | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | xuylan888 | 48% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | yoManChigago | 64% | 33 |
| #2 | Lentävä sBaGetti | 54% | 189 |
| #3 | ari housu | 54% | 35 |
| #4 | Juhana | 50% | 26 |
| #5 | xuylan888 | 48% | 114 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xuylan888 | 21 | 0.0094 |
| #2 | ari housu | 13 | 0.0183 |
| #3 | Lentävä sBaGetti | 3 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | Juhana | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | yoManChigago | 1 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | xuylan888 | 337 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #2 | ari housu | 152 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #3 | yoManChigago | 106 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #4 | Juhana | 84 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | Lentävä sBaGetti | 79 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NattilanJake | +1.87 | 62 | 62 |
| #2 | yoManChigago | +1.48 | 70 | 58 |
| #3 | ari housu | +0.89 | 46 | 47 |
| #4 | Lentävä sBaGetti | -0.04 | 54 | 25 |
| #5 | Juhana | -1.18 | 35 | 70 |





