










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 321 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 104 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




45 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1339 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,705 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 163 | 10% |
| Smokes | 468 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 552 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 522 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $252,265 of utility $82 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1074 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ted Mosby | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | DoomNut | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | LetMeNegevThem | 46% | 37 |
| #4 | EchoStrike | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ted Mosby | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | DoomNut | 49% | 39 |
| #3 | LetMeNegevThem | 46% | 37 |
| #4 | EchoStrike | 25% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DoomNut | 18 | 0.0228 |
| #2 | LetMeNegevThem | 14 | 0.0172 |
| #3 | Ted Mosby | 9 | 0.0108 |
| #4 | EchoStrike | 2 | 0.0114 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ted Mosby | 67 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | LetMeNegevThem | 53 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | EchoStrike | 30 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #4 | DoomNut | 1 | 0.00 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | EchoStrike | +2.95 | 77 | 44 |
| #2 | Ted Mosby | +2.52 | 61 | 51 |
| #3 | Stella Virgin | +1.27 | 54 | 23 |
| #4 | LetMeNegevThem | +0.64 | 35 | 48 |
| #5 | DoomNut | -1.18 | 50 | 17 |





