








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 191 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 315 matches | ||
| Premier | 211 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 58 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




49 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5453 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,024 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6415 | 49% |
| Smokes | 2519 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1352 | 10% |
| Molotovs | 2738 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,309,530 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2219 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zerk | 56% | 82 |
| #2 | Rodrigwayz | 49% | 61 |
| #3 | Merk | 49% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Zerk | 56% | 82 |
| #2 | Rodrigwayz | 49% | 61 |
| #3 | Merk | 49% | 43 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rodrigwayz | 8 | 0.0066 |
| #2 | Merk | 5 | 0.0060 |
| #3 | Zerk | 3 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merk | 242 | 0.29 | 6 min |
| #2 | Zerk | 156 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | Rodrigwayz | 99 | 0.08 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Merk | +5.73 | 47 | 65 |
| #2 | Rodrigwayz | +1.25 | 46 | 36 |
| #3 | CreepyUberGuy | -0.26 | 44 | 42 |
| #4 | Zerk | -0.35 | 28 | 63 |





