










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 388 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 194 matches | ||
| Faceit | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 56 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




40 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4061 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,953 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5630 | 28% |
| Smokes | 4815 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 4684 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4824 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,262,241 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 433 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Toniip | 64% | 53 |
| #2 | RedBaron | 60% | 42 |
| #3 | Mr.DocWhite | 55% | 38 |
| #4 | ^1philoponos | 53% | 64 |
| #5 | AngryJoey | 53% | 64 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rizky | 18 | 0.0076 |
| #2 | AngryJoey | 6 | 0.0048 |
| #3 | Gibbon | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | Ratze | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | ^1philoponos | 3 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Rizky | 599 | 0.25 | 17 min |
| #2 | ^1philoponos | 215 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #3 | AngryJoey | 184 | 0.15 | 4 min |
| #4 | Ratze | 165 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Gibbon | 124 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AngryJoey | +2.78 | 72 | 54 |
| #2 | Rizky | +2.56 | 67 | 70 |
| #3 | crrml | +1.64 | 72 | 62 |
| #4 | Toniip | +0.89 | 74 | 67 |
| #5 | ^1philoponos | +0.52 | 54 | 67 |





