








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 189 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 66 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Wingman | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
963 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,360 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 358 | 15% |
| Smokes | 1350 | 57% |
| HE Grenades | 137 | 6% |
| Molotovs | 515 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $575,160 of utility $148 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KUDGEL THE BICEPS | 55% | 11 |
| #2 | 𝑃𝑙𝑎𝑦𝑏𝑜𝑦لا | 47% | 17 |
| #3 | crrml | 44% | 68 |
| #4 | ^1philoponos | 39% | 31 |
| #5 | Shini | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crrml | 215 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | Ratze | 161 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Gibbon | 159 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #4 | ^1philoponos | 92 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #5 | n3rD | 34 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | crrml | +3.58 | 74 | 61 |
| #2 | Gibbon | +1.90 | 58 | 46 |
| #3 | Ratze | +1.24 | 66 | 52 |
| #4 | ^1philoponos | +1.15 | 57 | 62 |
| #5 | not Gibbon | +1.02 | 70 | 39 |





