








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 472 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 220 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 89 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




33 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7999 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,750 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7794 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4284 | 17% |
| HE Grenades | 6638 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 7034 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,074,533 of utility $100 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 82 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | MrMustache | 49% | 88 |
| #5 | M.Ruppert | 46% | 180 |
| #6 | Daryl_Ar0n | 44% | 77 |
| #7 | Gligzor | 40% | 151 |
| #8 | Analyst Dan | 36% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M.Ruppert | 10 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Gligzor | 8 | 0.0025 |
| #3 | Daryl_Ar0n | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #4 | -J- | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | nubber | 2 | 0.0003 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nubber | 456 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #2 | Gligzor | 336 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #3 | -J- | 316 | 0.10 | 8 min |
| #4 | MrMustache | 126 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| #5 | Daryl_Ar0n | 109 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | nubber | +2.56 | 37 | 60 |
| #2 | M.Ruppert | +0.99 | 61 | 32 |
| #3 | Daryl_Ar0n | +0.34 | 65 | 51 |
| #4 | j.snow | +0.22 | 40 | 54 |
| #5 | Gligzor | -1.64 | 35 | 57 |





