








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1220 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 331 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 81 matches | ||
| Wingman | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 24 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 57 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




90 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6850 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,588 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5220 | 27% |
| Smokes | 4916 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 5522 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 3930 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,994,152 of utility $149 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 425 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Souper Man | 54% | 37 |
| #2 | xxmurjiexx | 52% | 164 |
| #3 | Hamuts! | 48% | 52 |
| #4 | Fabius | 44% | 36 |
| #5 | LazyShot | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Souper Man | 54% | 37 |
| #2 | xxmurjiexx | 52% | 164 |
| #3 | Hamuts! | 48% | 52 |
| #4 | Fabius | 44% | 36 |
| #5 | LazyShot | 44% | 39 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Hamuts! | 22 | 0.0211 |
| #2 | xxmurjiexx | 9 | 0.0029 |
| #3 | LazyShot | 5 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | Fabius | 2 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | LazyShot | 67 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #2 | xxmurjiexx | 60 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #3 | Fabius | 31 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | Hamuts! | 24 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| #5 | Souper Man | 5 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | aim.exe TheHope | +2.88 | 66 | 62 |
| #2 | Hamuts! | -1.62 | 20 | 28 |
| #3 | Souper Man | -1.63 | 51 | 35 |
| #4 | LazyShot | -2.25 | 41 | 43 |
| #5 | Fabius | -3.86 | 16 | 53 |





