










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1317 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 146 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 98 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 68 matches | ||
| Wingman | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 63 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




96 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2525 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,257 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1150 | 27% |
| Smokes | 589 | 14% |
| HE Grenades | 1255 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1263 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,573,963 of utility $186 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 752 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herkzz | 55% | 177 |
| #2 | Merczzz | 53% | 81 |
| #3 | ioolisz | 44% | 48 |
| #4 | Spooky | 41% | 37 |
| #5 | t3ven. | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herkzz | 55% | 177 |
| #2 | Merczzz | 53% | 81 |
| #3 | ioolisz | 44% | 48 |
| #4 | Spooky | 41% | 37 |
| #5 | t3ven. | 33% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herkzz | 41 | 0.0133 |
| #2 | Merczzz | 17 | 0.0107 |
| #3 | t3ven. | 9 | 0.0202 |
| #4 | ioolisz | 8 | 0.0089 |
| #5 | Spooky | 3 | 0.0039 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herkzz | 516 | 0.17 | 11 min |
| #2 | Merczzz | 197 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Spooky | 144 | 0.19 | 3 min |
| #4 | ioolisz | 104 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #5 | t3ven. | 97 | 0.22 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | herkzz | +4.74 | 63 | 72 |
| #2 | t3ven. | +1.84 | 85 | 42 |
| #3 | Merczzz | +1.75 | 39 | 53 |
| #4 | Spooky | +0.64 | 28 | 73 |
| #5 | ioolisz | +0.02 | 33 | 28 |





