








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 845 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 265 matches | ||
| Wingman | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 93 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




55 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2664 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,204 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1759 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1615 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 1835 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 1995 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $674,842 of utility $86 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 559 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | August | 49% | 59 |
| #2 | Martin Burger King | 48% | 296 |
| #3 | Tenetard | 44% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | August | 49% | 59 |
| #2 | Martin Burger King | 48% | 296 |
| #3 | Tenetard | 44% | 165 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | August | 19 | 0.0169 |
| #2 | Martin Burger King | 18 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Tenetard | 5 | 0.0015 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tenetard | 877 | 0.27 | 20 min |
| #2 | August | 263 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #3 | Martin Burger King | 47 | 0.01 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | August | +7.67 | 81 | 65 |
| #2 | ᵈᵒⁿᵗ ᶜʳʸ ᵇᵃᵇʸ | +1.10 | 43 | 45 |
| #3 | Martin Burger King | -0.93 | 43 | 22 |
| #4 | Tenetard | -2.86 | 8 | 64 |





