








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 22 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




60 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1741 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,907 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2047 | 35% |
| Smokes | 1444 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 882 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 1534 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $210,704 of utility $65 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1197 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Max </3 | 78% | 9 |
| #2 | floof | 60% | 15 |
| #3 | davey | 53% | 15 |
| #4 | liNg | 52% | 44 |
| #5 | .amsinho | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | .amsinho | 50% | 12 |
| #6 | wheeliepbg | 46% | 13 |
| #7 | Max <3 | 40% | 10 |
| #8 | smog | 40% | 10 |
| #9 | Ronhim | 35% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | liNg | 16 | 0.0168 |
| #2 | floof | 13 | 0.0487 |
| #3 | wheeliepbg | 10 | 0.0455 |
| #4 | Ronhim | 5 | 0.0128 |
| #5 | smog | 2 | 0.0088 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | liNg | 186 | 0.20 | 3 min |
| #2 | davey | 66 | 0.20 | 2 min |
| #3 | Ronhim | 52 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #4 | floof | 45 | 0.17 | 1 min |
| #5 | smog | 45 | 0.20 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | davey | +2.35 | 80 | 72 |
| #2 | RICHE | +1.20 | 62 | 53 |
| #3 | .amsinho | +0.73 | 52 | 70 |
| #4 | Max <3 | +0.50 | 36 | 14 |
| #5 | Max </3 | +0.26 | 33 | 26 |





