








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 2 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 5 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
198 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 335 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 83 | 25% |
| Smokes | 96 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 81 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 75 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $55,300 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 17 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Algebra | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | retarded social agent | 67% | 3 |
| #3 | Quetzalcoatlus | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | 『Fairy』 | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | TW0_N1NE | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Quetzalcoatlus | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | 『Fairy』 | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | TW0_N1NE | 50% | 2 |
| #6 | smoked | 50% | 2 |
| #7 | Dante | 33% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TW0_N1NE | 2 | 0.0571 |
| #2 | Algebra | 1 | 0.0128 |
| #3 | Dante | 1 | 0.0164 |
| #4 | retarded social agent | 1 | 0.0182 |
| #5 | smoked | 1 | 0.0286 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dante | 6 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #2 | Quetzalcoatlus | 4 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| #3 | 『Fairy』 | 4 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #4 | retarded social agent | 3 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Algebra | 2 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | retarded social agent | +8.61 | 99 | 55 |
| #2 | Algebra | +4.82 | 51 | 44 |
| #3 | TW0_N1NE | +3.78 | 51 | 45 |
| #4 | 『Fairy』 | +0.95 | 61 | 38 |
| #5 | L09ic | +0.72 | 53 | 38 |





