








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 377 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 264 matches | ||
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3358 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,344 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2195 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2313 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2639 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 2197 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,275,163 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 39 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ( ° ﹏ ° ) | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | brunch enjoyer | 59% | 17 |
| #3 | Nightli | 56% | 18 |
| #4 | khadin | 48% | 157 |
| #5 | oRiaKu | 46% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | khadin | 48% | 157 |
| #5 | oRiaKu | 46% | 65 |
| #6 | jac0jac0 | 45% | 20 |
| #7 | Nukes | 44% | 39 |
| #8 | raygunn | 41% | 29 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brunch enjoyer | 1 | 0.0029 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | khadin | 451 | 0.13 | 10 min |
| #2 | oRiaKu | 276 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #3 | ( ° ﹏ ° ) | 214 | 0.23 | 5 min |
| #4 | raygunn | 139 | 0.24 | 3 min |
| #5 | brunch enjoyer | 101 | 0.29 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | brunch enjoyer | +1.32 | 59 | 75 |
| #2 | jac0jac0 | +0.82 | 78 | 41 |
| #3 | khadin | +0.55 | 85 | 49 |
| #4 | EgoPeak | +0.07 | 71 | 56 |
| #5 | ( ° ﹏ ° ) | -0.33 | 73 | 69 |





