








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 171 matches | ||
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




50 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2980 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,618 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1818 | 39% |
| Smokes | 1757 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 521 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 522 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $664,796 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 688 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moe Lester | 47% | 111 |
| #2 | Adidas | 43% | 89 |
| #3 | Swah | 41% | 234 |
| #4 | BingBong | 28% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Moe Lester | 47% | 111 |
| #2 | Adidas | 43% | 89 |
| #3 | Swah | 41% | 234 |
| #4 | BingBong | 28% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swah | 28 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | Moe Lester | 25 | 0.0134 |
| #3 | Adidas | 11 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | BingBong | 5 | 0.0111 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swah | 255 | 0.06 | 6 min |
| #2 | Moe Lester | 249 | 0.13 | 5 min |
| #3 | Adidas | 111 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #4 | BingBong | 15 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HoodedRust | +0.78 | 36 | 27 |
| #2 | Moe Lester | -0.17 | 28 | 36 |
| #3 | Swah | -1.66 | 17 | 22 |
| #4 | Adidas | -3.15 | 21 | 42 |
| #5 | BingBong | -6.56 | 15 | 11 |





