








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 780 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 626 matches | ||
| Faceit | 69 matches | ||
| Wingman | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




74 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7397 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,110 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 11442 | 47% |
| Smokes | 3963 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 4812 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 3893 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $3,179,916 of utility $193 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 769 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goose | 63% | 78 |
| #2 | Duck | 61% | 76 |
| #3 | VALENTE | 49% | 268 |
| #4 | filhodocapeta | 41% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goose | 63% | 78 |
| #2 | Duck | 61% | 76 |
| #3 | VALENTE | 49% | 268 |
| #4 | filhodocapeta | 41% | 134 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VALENTE | 18 | 0.0031 |
| #2 | Goose | 12 | 0.0073 |
| #3 | filhodocapeta | 9 | 0.0032 |
| #4 | Duck | 8 | 0.0048 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Duck | 259 | 0.16 | 8 min |
| #2 | filhodocapeta | 242 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #3 | VALENTE | 142 | 0.02 | 3 min |
| #4 | Goose | 38 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goose | +4.49 | 69 | 34 |
| #2 | VALENTE | +1.04 | 43 | 24 |
| #3 | D U A R T E | +0.65 | 43 | 59 |
| #4 | Duck | +0.40 | 34 | 73 |
| #5 | filhodocapeta | -4.25 | 33 | 32 |





