








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 407 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 695 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 105 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




73 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5689 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,015 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2977 | 20% |
| Smokes | 3329 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 3532 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 5177 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,797,329 of utility $114 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3056 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jason | 62% | 52 |
| #2 | f1shy | 55% | 95 |
| #3 | ♥ f1shy ♥ | 53% | 45 |
| #4 | RootinTootinPutin | 52% | 498 |
| #5 | DarkVenom | 48% | 84 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | RootinTootinPutin | 52% | 498 |
| #5 | DarkVenom | 48% | 84 |
| #6 | ♥ Penguin ♥ | 46% | 52 |
| #7 | WingNut | 45% | 89 |
| #8 | Vettie_007 | 38% | 65 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RootinTootinPutin | 40 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | f1shy | 14 | 0.0071 |
| #3 | Jason | 11 | 0.0102 |
| #4 | Vettie_007 | 8 | 0.0059 |
| #5 | ♥ f1shy ♥ | 7 | 0.0073 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | RootinTootinPutin | 484 | 0.05 | 11 min |
| #2 | f1shy | 213 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #3 | ♥ f1shy ♥ | 118 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| #4 | Jason | 114 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #5 | ♥ Penguin ♥ | 70 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥ Penguin ♥ | +3.24 | 76 | 43 |
| #2 | f1shy | +2.65 | 68 | 52 |
| #3 | ♥ f1shy ♥ | +0.41 | 58 | 48 |
| #4 | diejappie | +0.41 | 65 | 40 |
| #5 | Jason | +0.41 | 55 | 54 |





