








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 849 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 378 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 29 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Faceit | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 145 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4936 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,444 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 120 | 5% |
| Smokes | 535 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 792 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 997 | 41% |
Our logs show you have wasted $558,932 of utility $45 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 178 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snaXteRs ツ | 60% | 42 |
| #2 | 𝒮𝓃☃𝓌𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓃 | 55% | 75 |
| #3 | [LL]Devil Dog | 51% | 47 |
| #4 | paceman | 49% | 141 |
| #5 | He_2 | 46% | 282 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | 𝒮𝓃☃𝓌𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓃 | 55% | 75 |
| #3 | [LL]Devil Dog | 51% | 47 |
| #4 | paceman | 49% | 141 |
| #5 | He_2 | 46% | 282 |
| #6 | Young_Ted | 46% | 319 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Young_Ted | 36 | 0.0055 |
| #2 | He_2 | 25 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | paceman | 7 | 0.0024 |
| #4 | snaXteRs ツ | 4 | 0.0045 |
| #5 | 𝒮𝓃☃𝓌𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓃 | 2 | 0.0013 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | paceman | 393 | 0.14 | 10 min |
| #2 | Young_Ted | 329 | 0.05 | 8 min |
| #3 | He_2 | 213 | 0.04 | 5 min |
| #4 | 𝒮𝓃☃𝓌𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓃 | 72 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | snaXteRs ツ | 11 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Young_Ted | +2.21 | 53 | 60 |
| #2 | 𝒮𝓃☃𝓌𝒷𝑒𝒶𝓃 | +0.86 | 46 | 61 |
| #3 | snaXteRs ツ | +0.44 | 54 | 29 |
| #4 | He_2 | +0.20 | 33 | 46 |
| #5 | kyllignen | -0.92 | 51 | 19 |





