








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 601 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 402 matches | ||
| Faceit | 78 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 21 different maps





Our logs show 98 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




52 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3917 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 25,535 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 9269 | 36% |
| Smokes | 7685 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 6419 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 2162 | 8% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,514,020 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 751 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !FoX | 70% | 33 |
| #2 | ᴛʜ | 49% | 548 |
| #3 | Milfina | 45% | 92 |
| #4 | SL3V3N | 37% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | !FoX | 70% | 33 |
| #2 | ᴛʜ | 49% | 548 |
| #3 | Milfina | 45% | 92 |
| #4 | SL3V3N | 37% | 97 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴛʜ | 27 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | !FoX | 7 | 0.0095 |
| #3 | SL3V3N | 5 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Milfina | 4 | 0.0021 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴛʜ | 2233 | 0.20 | 57 min |
| #2 | SL3V3N | 229 | 0.11 | 5 min |
| #3 | Milfina | 132 | 0.07 | 3 min |
| #4 | !FoX | 53 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Milfina | +2.67 | 64 | 54 |
| #2 | ᴛʜ | +1.61 | 64 | 69 |
| #3 | SL3V3N | -0.79 | 28 | 66 |
| #4 | SC | -1.00 | 38 | 71 |
| #5 | !FoX | -1.28 | 26 | 64 |





