








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 69 matches | ||
| Faceit | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 20 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
980 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,478 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 907 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1051 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 958 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 562 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $492,304 of utility $220 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 399 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BeYonD | 63% | 8 |
| #2 | Rawn | 41% | 32 |
| #3 | kraT0$ | 38% | 34 |
| #4 | BLACK_sparrow | 33% | 6 |
| #5 | INTENTION | 33% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | kraT0$ | 38% | 34 |
| #4 | BLACK_sparrow | 33% | 6 |
| #5 | INTENTION | 33% | 18 |
| #6 | 𝓦ɑɗ𝑒 AnonyMouse | 33% | 42 |
| #7 | KnoX | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓦ɑɗ𝑒 AnonyMouse | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #2 | BeYonD | 2 | 0.0094 |
| #3 | kraT0$ | 1 | 0.0014 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | kraT0$ | 102 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | 𝓦ɑɗ𝑒 AnonyMouse | 73 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #3 | Rawn | 35 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #4 | BeYonD | 30 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | KnoX | 25 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KnoX | +4.18 | 70 | 62 |
| #2 | BeYonD | +2.53 | 33 | 58 |
| #3 | INTENTION | +1.79 | 44 | 63 |
| #4 | SHANKS | +1.42 | 43 | 60 |
| #5 | 𝓦ɑɗ𝑒 AnonyMouse | -0.99 | 59 | 64 |





