










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 769 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 164 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1450 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,911 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1190 | 24% |
| Smokes | 1497 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 880 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1344 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $738,407 of utility $178 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 238 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reaaalll_badman | 53% | 137 |
| #2 | Swag-. | 52% | 93 |
| #3 | GET DUCKED | 50% | 28 |
| #4 | ruan2.bosman | 48% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | reaaalll_badman | 53% | 137 |
| #2 | Swag-. | 52% | 93 |
| #3 | GET DUCKED | 50% | 28 |
| #4 | ruan2.bosman | 48% | 110 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruan2.bosman | 10 | 0.0042 |
| #2 | GET DUCKED | 6 | 0.0104 |
| #3 | reaaalll_badman | 3 | 0.0010 |
| #4 | Swag-. | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ruan2.bosman | 334 | 0.14 | 8 min |
| #2 | reaaalll_badman | 139 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #3 | Swag-. | 95 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | GET DUCKED | 61 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Swag-. | +1.48 | 41 | 32 |
| #2 | GET DUCKED | +0.03 | 35 | 46 |
| #3 | Enxy | -0.04 | 48 | 50 |
| #4 | reaaalll_badman | -1.20 | 33 | 46 |
| #5 | ruan2.bosman | -1.89 | 33 | 44 |





