








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 198 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 240 matches | ||
| Wingman | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




19 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3299 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,954 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2310 | 29% |
| Smokes | 2894 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 1269 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 1481 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $442,144 of utility $63 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 160 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Fire_clutch | 58% | 36 |
| #2 | Earlybird | 50% | 146 |
| #3 | BTK | 43% | 176 |
| #4 | Mr Only Deagle | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | Queen earlybird | 39% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Earlybird | 50% | 146 |
| #3 | BTK | 43% | 176 |
| #4 | Mr Only Deagle | 43% | 21 |
| #5 | Queen earlybird | 39% | 127 |
| #6 | Teamboshka | 38% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Earlybird | 4 | 0.0013 |
| #2 | BTK | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | Queen earlybird | 3 | 0.0013 |
| #4 | Fire_clutch | 2 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | Teamboshka | 2 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BTK | 86 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #2 | Earlybird | 71 | 0.02 | 2 min |
| #3 | Queen earlybird | 44 | 0.02 | 1 min |
| #4 | Fire_clutch | 44 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mr Only Deagle | 25 | 0.06 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gramze | +2.25 | 67 | 54 |
| #2 | Fire_clutch | +0.86 | 32 | 53 |
| #3 | Mr Only Deagle | +0.39 | 56 | 46 |
| #4 | Queen earlybird | -1.49 | 42 | 37 |
| #5 | Earlybird | -1.60 | 40 | 34 |





