








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
571 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,251 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 269 | 22% |
| Smokes | 253 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 385 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 344 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $140,449 of utility $127 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herbus Doubledoor | 60% | 30 |
| #2 | Z€nY | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | zen | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | huile de palme | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | ImDeSTru | 36% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Z€nY | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | zen | 57% | 21 |
| #4 | huile de palme | 40% | 5 |
| #5 | ImDeSTru | 36% | 14 |
| #6 | Aimtoo | 25% | 4 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zen | 8 | 0.0199 |
| #2 | Herbus Doubledoor | 2 | 0.0036 |
| #3 | ImDeSTru | 1 | 0.0038 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herbus Doubledoor | 57 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | zen | 35 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #3 | ImDeSTru | 19 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #4 | Z€nY | 18 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #5 | Aimtoo | 18 | 0.22 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Herbus Doubledoor | +4.19 | 79 | 67 |
| #2 | zen | +1.14 | 84 | 42 |
| #3 | biorn1ke | -0.98 | 85 | 40 |
| #4 | Z€nY | -1.16 | 73 | 65 |
| #5 | Aimtoo | -1.32 | 80 | 44 |





