








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1046 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 186 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 119 matches | ||
| Premier | 100 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 56 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3904 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,717 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5429 | 28% |
| Smokes | 6613 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 3156 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4519 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,780,678 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 267 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sang | 69% | 39 |
| #2 | W1e | 60% | 96 |
| #3 | SuraimuTW | 60% | 45 |
| #4 | The one | 52% | 56 |
| #5 | ΧιαοΦεηγΤW | 49% | 51 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | W1e | 296 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #2 | ΧιαοΦεηγΤW | 267 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #3 | SuraimuTW | 241 | 0.26 | 6 min |
| #4 | 笑顔がすべてをもたら | 230 | 0.20 | 5 min |
| #5 | Sang | 159 | 0.20 | 3 min |





