










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 35 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




41 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3027 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,702 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1737 | 30% |
| Smokes | 1005 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 1988 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 972 | 17% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,459,140 of utility $170 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 293 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goober | 51% | 249 |
| #2 | finhacka | 48% | 328 |
| #3 | Fehj | 45% | 128 |
| #4 | kairos. | 39% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goober | 51% | 249 |
| #2 | finhacka | 48% | 328 |
| #3 | Fehj | 45% | 128 |
| #4 | kairos. | 39% | 72 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | finhacka | 29 | 0.0044 |
| #2 | Goober | 22 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | Fehj | 16 | 0.0060 |
| #4 | kairos. | 1 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goober | 625 | 0.12 | 17 min |
| #2 | finhacka | 550 | 0.08 | 11 min |
| #3 | Fehj | 539 | 0.20 | 12 min |
| #4 | kairos. | 105 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Goober | +2.29 | 70 | 51 |
| #2 | Fehj | +1.34 | 61 | 54 |
| #3 | finhacka | +0.15 | 58 | 35 |
| #4 | kairos. | -0.55 | 46 | 48 |
| #5 | Wagyu | -0.79 | 55 | 32 |





