










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1460 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 662 matches | ||
| Faceit | 148 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 125 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




137 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
9404 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,721 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8505 | 34% |
| Smokes | 6746 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 6356 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3114 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,779,206 of utility $145 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 756 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | white | 64% | 53 |
| #2 | ✟♛Miszter♛✟☢ | 59% | 85 |
| #3 | Anon | 58% | 78 |
| #4 | gecieros.- | 57% | 113 |
| #5 | ᠌ fodi | 56% | 743 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ✟♛Miszter♛✟☢ | 59% | 85 |
| #3 | Anon | 58% | 78 |
| #4 | gecieros.- | 57% | 113 |
| #5 | ᠌ fodi | 56% | 743 |
| #6 | Danhuel | 48% | 93 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᠌ fodi | 149 | 0.0097 |
| #2 | gecieros.- | 9 | 0.0037 |
| #3 | ✟♛Miszter♛✟☢ | 8 | 0.0045 |
| #4 | white | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #5 | Danhuel | 1 | 0.0005 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᠌ fodi | 1792 | 0.12 | 48 min |
| #2 | ✟♛Miszter♛✟☢ | 429 | 0.24 | 12 min |
| #3 | Danhuel | 380 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #4 | gecieros.- | 352 | 0.15 | 9 min |
| #5 | Anon | 170 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | white | +4.25 | 93 | 58 |
| #2 | ᠌ fodi | +1.11 | 83 | 66 |
| #3 | gecieros.- | +0.92 | 90 | 66 |
| #4 | LaggR666 | +0.05 | 69 | 49 |
| #5 | Anon | -0.40 | 67 | 61 |





