








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 8 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
310 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,497 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 311 | 21% |
| Smokes | 268 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 485 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 433 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $39,423 of utility $30 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tier | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | ECHY | 48% | 23 |
| #3 | usp | 38% | 29 |
| #4 | Solo | 33% | 33 |
| #5 | defiantz | 27% | 11 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ECHY | 48% | 23 |
| #3 | usp | 38% | 29 |
| #4 | Solo | 33% | 33 |
| #5 | defiantz | 27% | 11 |
| #6 | Xelton | 0% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solo | 1 | 0.0015 |
| #2 | usp | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Solo | 80 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| #2 | usp | 76 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | defiantz | 41 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| #4 | ECHY | 33 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| #5 | Tier | 21 | 0.28 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tier | +4.24 | 93 | 75 |
| #2 | defiantz | +3.14 | 95 | 56 |
| #3 | ECHY | +1.60 | 80 | 36 |
| #4 | Solo | +0.28 | 76 | 48 |
| #5 | Xelton | +0.14 | 84 | 26 |





