










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 250 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 233 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 178 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 121 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 116 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 97 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 70 matches | ||
| Premier | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 168 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




21 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
10839 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 46,151 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 18181 | 39% |
| Smokes | 8932 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 11824 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 7214 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,762,947 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 143 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dong | 1814 | 0.16 | 47 min |
| #2 | SilVER | 1044 | 0.11 | 27 min |
| #3 | 김후추 | 561 | 0.09 | 15 min |
| #4 | milfass | 458 | 0.03 | 13 min |
| #5 | n0¹ry | 435 | 0.05 | 10 min |





