








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 334 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 343 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2552 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,194 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1256 | 11% |
| Smokes | 2152 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4507 | 40% |
| Molotovs | 3279 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,359,453 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 65 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maliboo_88 | 59% | 85 |
| #2 | ttv/mewmew1569 | 58% | 85 |
| #3 | WeaselWarrior | 53% | 126 |
| #4 | The Gunnar™ | 45% | 240 |
| #5 | HaV0C | 42% | 146 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Maliboo_88 | 59% | 85 |
| #2 | ttv/mewmew1569 | 58% | 85 |
| #3 | WeaselWarrior | 53% | 126 |
| #4 | The Gunnar™ | 45% | 240 |
| #5 | HaV0C | 42% | 146 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttv/mewmew1569 | 11 | 0.0067 |
| #2 | The Gunnar™ | 9 | 0.0018 |
| #3 | HaV0C | 8 | 0.0028 |
| #4 | WeaselWarrior | 8 | 0.0031 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | HaV0C | 381 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #2 | The Gunnar™ | 323 | 0.07 | 9 min |
| #3 | WeaselWarrior | 140 | 0.05 | 4 min |
| #4 | Maliboo_88 | 57 | 0.03 | 2 min |
| #5 | ttv/mewmew1569 | 52 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ttv/mewmew1569 | +3.38 | 83 | 56 |
| #2 | WeaselWarrior | +1.30 | 38 | 57 |
| #3 | The Gunnar™ | +1.07 | 29 | 30 |
| #4 | HaV0C | +0.67 | 53 | 60 |
| #5 | Maliboo_88 | -1.02 | 15 | 32 |





