








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 526 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
849 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 993 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 337 | 34% |
| Smokes | 340 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 161 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 155 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $157,967 of utility $124 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 52 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AitoLepa | 83% | 23 |
| #2 | Vantaan p3kkocs | 75% | 8 |
| #3 | Teppo | 74% | 35 |
| #4 | Teppo | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | poro | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | Teppo | 74% | 35 |
| #4 | Teppo | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | poro | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | Manipulator | 50% | 6 |
| #7 | V3Xッ | 40% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teppo | 16 | 0.0244 |
| #2 | AitoLepa | 6 | 0.0149 |
| #3 | Teppo | 5 | 0.0224 |
| #4 | Vantaan p3kkocs | 2 | 0.0117 |
| #5 | Manipulator | 1 | 0.0120 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Teppo | 68 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #2 | AitoLepa | 59 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #3 | Vantaan p3kkocs | 48 | 0.28 | 1 min |
| #4 | Teppo | 11 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #5 | Manipulator | 6 | 0.07 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Vantaan p3kkocs | +6.43 | 46 | 62 |
| #2 | Teppo | +5.51 | 65 | 13 |
| #3 | Teppo | +4.85 | 64 | 42 |
| #4 | unxpected | +3.81 | 47 | 28 |
| #5 | Manipulator | +1.97 | 96 | 9 |





