








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 35 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 49 matches | ||
| Faceit | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 9 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




4 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1405 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,378 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1247 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1253 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 780 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 1098 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $373,151 of utility $126 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gilas | 55% | 40 |
| #2 | NaKooooo | 50% | 10 |
| #3 | n0VICey | 50% | 38 |
| #4 | Kurozu | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | edf1sh | 50% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Gilas | 55% | 40 |
| #2 | NaKooooo | 50% | 10 |
| #3 | n0VICey | 50% | 38 |
| #4 | Kurozu | 50% | 46 |
| #5 | edf1sh | 50% | 54 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | edf1sh | 2 | 0.0018 |
| #2 | Gilas | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kurozu | 271 | 0.28 | 7 min |
| #2 | edf1sh | 241 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| #3 | n0VICey | 196 | 0.25 | 6 min |
| #4 | Gilas | 148 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | NaKooooo | 41 | 0.19 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | NaKooooo | +3.45 | 81 | 79 |
| #2 | Gilas | +2.37 | 74 | 68 |
| #3 | n0VICey | +0.91 | 62 | 78 |
| #4 | Kurozu | +0.83 | 69 | 68 |
| #5 | BENKEI | -0.41 | 75 | 53 |





