








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 197 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 35 matches | ||
| Faceit | 20 matches | ||
| Wingman | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1189 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,919 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 303 | 16% |
| Smokes | 562 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 487 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 567 | 30% |
Our logs show you have wasted $493,571 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 48 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Linus | 83% | 6 |
| #2 | Liamdoprovod | 73% | 22 |
| #3 | banana beans | 63% | 41 |
| #4 | charl1e | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Young Tug | 50% | 6 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banana beans | 4 | 0.0047 |
| #2 | 𝐙𝐞𝐳𝐚𝐤 ㋡ | 3 | 0.0275 |
| #3 | Liamdoprovod | 1 | 0.0020 |
| #4 | charl1e | 1 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banana beans | 175 | 0.20 | 4 min |
| #2 | Liamdoprovod | 65 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #3 | Linus | 24 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| #4 | Young Tug | 19 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | charl1e | 16 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴰʲ ᴷˡⁱᵇ | +2.00 | 79 | 45 |
| #2 | banana beans | +1.26 | 93 | 63 |
| #3 | Liamdoprovod | +0.90 | 82 | 69 |
| #4 | Linus | -0.16 | 95 | 61 |
| #5 | charl1e | -0.77 | 85 | 66 |





