








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 259 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 101 matches | ||
| Faceit | 32 matches | ||
| Esplay | 8 matches | 2,096 | |
| Wingman | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2081 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,057 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1730 | 25% |
| Smokes | 1905 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2052 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1370 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $491,183 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 76 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ᴰʲ ᴷˡⁱᵇ | 73% | 22 |
| #2 | charl1e | 71% | 14 |
| #3 | banana beans | 63% | 57 |
| #4 | Linus | 54% | 52 |
| #5 | Stefz | 50% | 12 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | banana beans | +2.61 | 95 | 66 |
| #2 | Liamdoprovod | +1.95 | 81 | 69 |
| #3 | ᴰʲ ᴷˡⁱᵇ | +0.65 | 69 | 50 |
| #4 | Stefz | +0.10 | 81 | 59 |
| #5 | Linus | -0.14 | 85 | 67 |





