








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 17 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 154 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




92 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1797 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,548 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 668 | 19% |
| Smokes | 1270 | 36% |
| HE Grenades | 858 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 752 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $277,946 of utility $76 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 135 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dezzy | 53% | 15 |
| #2 | Norrlands guld 5.3 | 50% | 10 |
| #3 | heRrWiNKLa | 49% | 86 |
| #4 | jp | 44% | 27 |
| #5 | RAINERWAHNSINN | 44% | 36 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | heRrWiNKLa | 30 | 0.0176 |
| #2 | VwieVendetta | 13 | 0.0123 |
| #3 | RAINERWAHNSINN | 12 | 0.0158 |
| #4 | Pfannenwender | 9 | 0.0155 |
| #5 | Dezzy | 6 | 0.0218 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | jp | +3.81 | 64 | 22 |
| #2 | Rudolph the red nosed Reindeer | +3.65 | 59 | 44 |
| #3 | VwieVendetta | +0.19 | 25 | 31 |
| #4 | heRrWiNKLa | -0.13 | 36 | 22 |
| #5 | Pfannenwender | -1.59 | 22 | 52 |





