








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 77 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 35 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 6 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
395 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,799 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 581 | 32% |
| Smokes | 574 | 32% |
| HE Grenades | 151 | 8% |
| Molotovs | 493 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $118,780 of utility $116 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 23 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | tob1 | 75% | 4 |
| #2 | Preschita | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | 死Lugh | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | JaBu | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | twitch.tv/graf_yannic | 50% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | 死Lugh | 56% | 16 |
| #4 | JaBu | 50% | 4 |
| #5 | twitch.tv/graf_yannic | 50% | 16 |
| #6 | ♥DeV1n3♥ | 29% | 14 |
| #7 | Sometime[SSJ]♕ | 0% | 3 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Preschita | 1 | 0.0043 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♥DeV1n3♥ | 77 | 0.28 | 2 min |
| #2 | 死Lugh | 63 | 0.21 | 1 min |
| #3 | twitch.tv/graf_yannic | 52 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #4 | Preschita | 33 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #5 | JaBu | 9 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 死Lugh | +3.66 | 82 | 74 |
| #2 | JaBu | +3.41 | 70 | 47 |
| #3 | Preschita | +2.85 | 67 | 66 |
| #4 | twitch.tv/graf_yannic | +1.69 | 75 | 70 |
| #5 | KA$H | -0.30 | 63 | 67 |





