










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 243 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 172 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 54 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 35 matches | ||
| Wingman | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 30 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




31 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2423 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 6,547 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1438 | 22% |
| Smokes | 1783 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1597 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1729 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,354,167 of utility $175 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 776 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lotus | 64% | 25 |
| #2 | ☯KoT | 62% | 26 |
| #3 | syphin1965 | 56% | 34 |
| #4 | Domi ︻芫 ——' | 51% | 77 |
| #5 | Yuno | 48% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Yuno | 48% | 25 |
| #6 | ssssssss | 47% | 66 |
| #7 | [Unex] ZODON | 44% | 59 |
| #8 | 𝗨𝗡𝗘𝗫 | ♡JOKO♡ | 40% | 89 |
| #9 | 𝗨𝗡𝗘𝗫 | PulseBre4ker | 35% | 37 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝗨𝗡𝗘𝗫 | ♡JOKO♡ | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #2 | [Unex] ZODON | 5 | 0.0041 |
| #3 | Domi ︻芫 ——' | 4 | 0.0026 |
| #4 | ☯KoT | 4 | 0.0084 |
| #5 | ssssssss | 1 | 0.0007 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝗨𝗡𝗘𝗫 | ♡JOKO♡ | 230 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #2 | [Unex] ZODON | 217 | 0.18 | 5 min |
| #3 | Domi ︻芫 ——' | 152 | 0.10 | 3 min |
| #4 | syphin1965 | 108 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #5 | 𝗨𝗡𝗘𝗫 | PulseBre4ker | 93 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☯KoT | +5.91 | 64 | 63 |
| #2 | ssssssss | +4.78 | 73 | 53 |
| #3 | Lotus | +3.12 | 69 | 39 |
| #4 | syphin1965 | +2.40 | 60 | 56 |
| #5 | [Unex] ZODON | +2.38 | 58 | 58 |





