








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1638 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 331 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 57 matches | ||
| Faceit | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 33 matches | ||
| Esplay | 14 matches | 1,801 | |
| Competitive Vertigo | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 222 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




176 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5876 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 14,261 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3880 | 27% |
| Smokes | 2639 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 4552 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 3190 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,196,179 of utility $105 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 641 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tog wid da hat | 51% | 81 |
| #2 | Shakur | 45% | 396 |
| #3 | Señor-Jarska | 45% | 51 |
| #4 | vejo | 45% | 98 |
| #5 | jomi | 41% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Shakur | +1.71 | 74 | 60 |
| #2 | Tog wid da hat | +1.06 | 72 | 46 |
| #3 | vejo | +1.02 | 82 | 51 |
| #4 | AtteAppelsiini | -0.17 | 60 | 53 |
| #5 | jomi | -0.21 | 64 | 57 |





