








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 385 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 15 matches | ||
| Premier | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 41 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




94 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2686 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,572 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1885 | 34% |
| Smokes | 662 | 12% |
| HE Grenades | 1792 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 1233 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $919,282 of utility $130 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 472 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༄𝓑𝓘𝓖 𝓢𝓜𝓞𝓚𝓔༄ | 46% | 272 |
| #2 | Myllymies | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | 𝓟𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓟88 | 38% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༄𝓑𝓘𝓖 𝓢𝓜𝓞𝓚𝓔༄ | 46% | 272 |
| #2 | Myllymies | 42% | 31 |
| #3 | 𝓟𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓟88 | 38% | 168 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༄𝓑𝓘𝓖 𝓢𝓜𝓞𝓚𝓔༄ | 103 | 0.0199 |
| #2 | 𝓟𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓟88 | 55 | 0.0181 |
| #3 | Myllymies | 8 | 0.0135 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ༄𝓑𝓘𝓖 𝓢𝓜𝓞𝓚𝓔༄ | 610 | 0.12 | 11 min |
| #2 | 𝓟𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓟88 | 438 | 0.14 | 7 min |
| #3 | Myllymies | 70 | 0.12 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 𝓟𝓱𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓟88 | +0.35 | 36 | 48 |
| #2 | ༄𝓑𝓘𝓖 𝓢𝓜𝓞𝓚𝓔༄ | +0.20 | 39 | 36 |
| #3 | Myllymies | -0.85 | 41 | 34 |
| #4 | makkara markus⛟ | -1.09 | 51 | 34 |





