








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 249 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 136 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 10 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1831 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,589 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 798 | 22% |
| Smokes | 710 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 1069 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 1012 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $121,634 of utility $40 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 44 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WESTiiE | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Mimic ツ | 57% | 60 |
| #3 | default | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | Mcauley Caulkin | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | ty | 45% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WESTiiE | 70% | 10 |
| #2 | Mimic ツ | 57% | 60 |
| #3 | default | 54% | 46 |
| #4 | Mcauley Caulkin | 53% | 47 |
| #5 | ty | 45% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mcauley Caulkin | 3 | 0.0029 |
| #2 | ty | 1 | 0.0006 |
| #3 | Mimic ツ | 1 | 0.0007 |
| #4 | default | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mimic ツ | 185 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| #2 | Mcauley Caulkin | 181 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #3 | ty | 171 | 0.11 | 4 min |
| #4 | WESTiiE | 71 | 0.32 | 2 min |
| #5 | default | 34 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WESTiiE | +4.04 | 82 | 76 |
| #2 | Tozic | +2.92 | 86 | 54 |
| #3 | ty | +0.13 | 77 | 63 |
| #4 | Mcauley Caulkin | +0.06 | 66 | 67 |
| #5 | default | -0.99 | 60 | 41 |





