








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 196 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 50 matches | ||
| Wingman | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 38 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
679 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,125 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 189 | 9% |
| Smokes | 814 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 468 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 654 | 31% |
Our logs show you have wasted $657,905 of utility $300 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 8 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mehu-Janne | 47% | 34 |
| #2 | Sant-tu | 44% | 72 |
| #3 | Otso | 41% | 68 |
| #4 | Santzhez | 35% | 68 |
| #5 | Sak-ke | 32% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mehu-Janne | 47% | 34 |
| #2 | Sant-tu | 44% | 72 |
| #3 | Otso | 41% | 68 |
| #4 | Santzhez | 35% | 68 |
| #5 | Sak-ke | 32% | 44 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sant-tu | 5 | 0.0032 |
| #2 | Otso | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | Santzhez | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #4 | Sak-ke | 2 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | Mehu-Janne | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sant-tu | 140 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | Otso | 125 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #3 | Santzhez | 102 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | Sak-ke | 42 | 0.05 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mehu-Janne | 19 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mehu-Janne | +2.37 | 77 | 49 |
| #2 | Sant-tu | +1.42 | 66 | 66 |
| #3 | Otso | +1.34 | 73 | 61 |
| #4 | Santzhez | -0.63 | 50 | 60 |
| #5 | spuge2 | -2.69 | 39 | 37 |





