










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 71 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
582 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 735 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 244 | 33% |
| Smokes | 65 | 9% |
| HE Grenades | 183 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 243 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $400,396 of utility $183 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 15 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | lan | 68% | 19 |
| #2 | Palletarol | 43% | 89 |
| #3 | flEx | 43% | 80 |
| #4 | MEM | 42% | 26 |
| #5 | kev | 42% | 81 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Palletarol | 43% | 89 |
| #3 | flEx | 43% | 80 |
| #4 | MEM | 42% | 26 |
| #5 | kev | 42% | 81 |
| #6 | V31NSTAR | 40% | 63 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Palletarol | 9 | 0.0049 |
| #2 | flEx | 8 | 0.0049 |
| #3 | kev | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | MEM | 3 | 0.0056 |
| #5 | lan | 1 | 0.0026 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flEx | 357 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #2 | kev | 331 | 0.20 | 9 min |
| #3 | Palletarol | 164 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #4 | lan | 101 | 0.26 | 2 min |
| #5 | MEM | 84 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | flEx | +5.26 | 64 | 70 |
| #2 | Palletarol | +2.90 | 76 | 39 |
| #3 | MEM | +2.12 | 62 | 63 |
| #4 | kev | +1.17 | 64 | 53 |
| #5 | lan | +0.93 | 54 | 64 |





