








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1345 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 95 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 92 matches | ||
| Wingman | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 83 matches | ||
| Faceit | 76 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 24 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 55 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




81 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
7066 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,395 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7336 | 30% |
| Smokes | 7220 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 5493 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 4346 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,212,062 of utility $95 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1024 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | F13ND | 360 | 0.30 | 4 min |
| #2 | naku | 226 | 0.15 | 5 min |
| #3 | Ew0lf | 225 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | JÄTTI | 205 | 0.24 | 6 min |
| #5 | Minsq | 149 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | onzo | +4.22 | 77 | 70 |
| #2 | JÄTTI | +1.91 | 82 | 71 |
| #3 | Ew0lf | +0.21 | 73 | 54 |
| #4 | naku | -0.13 | 62 | 55 |
| #5 | ⎛⎝( ` ᢍ ´ )⎠⎞ᵐᵘʰ | -0.47 | 68 | 53 |





